Funny Short Stories / Level O - A story about an old the dog (Příběh o starém psovi)

 The old Dog 

A story about an old the dog

There was once a man who had a dog. 

While the dog was young he was made much of, but when he grew old he was driven out of doors.

 

So he went and lay outside the fence, and a wolf came up to him and said,

 “Doggy, why so down in the mouth?”––“While I was young,” said the dog,

“they made much of me; but now that I am old they beat me.”

 The wolf said, “I see thy master in the field; go after him, and perchance he’ll give thee something.”––“Nay,” said the dog, “they won’t even let me walk about the fields now, they only beat me.”––“Look now,” said the wolf, “I’m sorry, and will make things better for thee. 

Thy mistress, I see, has put her child down beneath that wagon.

 I’ll seize it, and make off with it. 

Run thou after me and bark, and though thou hast no teeth left, 

touzle me as much as thou canst, so that thy mistress may see it.”

So the wolf seized the child, and ran away with it, and the dog ran after him, 

and began to touzle him.

 His mistress saw it, and made after them with a harrow, crying at the same time, “Husband, husband! the wolf has got the child! Gabriel, Gabriel! don’t you see? 

The wolf has got the child!” Then the man chased the wolf, and got back the child.

 “Brave old dog!” said he; “you are old and toothless, and yet you can give help in time of need, and will not let your master’s child be stolen.” And henceforth the woman and her husband gave the old dog a large lump of bread every day.

The Dog

Linda Robinson was very thirsty so she went into a cafe. There was an old woman in the cafe. She was sitting near the door at a table. At her feet, under the table, there was a small dog. Linda bought a glass of lemonade and some cookies. She sat down at the table next to the old woman.

The old woman sat quietly. She looked lonely. Linda decided to be kind and talk to the old woman. “It is very hot today.” she said. “Yes, but it is nice inside here.” replied the old woman.

Linda looked at the dog and asked, “Does your dog like people.” The woman answered, “Oh! Yes! She loves people.” Linda wanted to give the dog a cookie. 

So she asked, “ Does your dog like cookies?”

“They are his favourite food.” said the old lady. Linda was terribly afraid of dogs so she asked, “Does your dog bite?” The old woman smiled and said, “ NO! My dog is very tame. She is even afraid of cats!”

Linda took a cookie in her hand and reached under the table. She put it near the dog’s mouth. But the dog didn’t bite the cookie, she bit her hand! Linda jumped up, spilling her lemonade. She screamed, “I thought you said, your dog didn’t bite.”

The old woman looked at Linda and then at the dog.
Then she said, “THAT’S NOT MY DOG!”

Cookies

One day, while my friend and I were traveling through Germany, we were very hungry but we didn’t have a lot of money. We decided to stop at a village market to get a few groceries. I chose some cookies and went to the front counter to pay. Near the counter I saw some packaged cookies in a large bin. They looked good and were a lot cheaper than the ones I had in my hand, so I took them instead.

We left the store and looked for a place where we could eat. We found a quiet place under a tree and we ate our sandwiches first, and then the cookies and We thought they were great.

«Let’s get these again,» I said. «They’re cheap and they really taste good.»
My friend can read some German, but I can’t, so I gave her the package so she could look for the brand name. She looked at it and then started to laugh.

«Why are you laughing?» I asked.
«Because they’re dog biscuits!» she said.